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Could I get that contraceptive patch instead? If a man is a quality, caring husband — as most intended to be at the wedding — then his immersion is this sex-saturated modern culture contributes to his fall to temptation. I would suggest that you find a therapist , just for you, someone who can help you process these emotions and consider what healthy boundaries will look like for you in these circumstances. These are just for you, Dan. If both partners do that, it is beautiful. They could go to places that she likes and perhaps see them differently as we often do when with a a different person. I know you know that this is NOT about you!